Feb 18, 2014

Smiles of the Bible


Q. What kind of man was Boaz before he married Ruth?
A. Ruthless.
 
Q. What do they call pastors in Germany ?
A. German Shepherds.

 
 
Q. Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?
A. Noah He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.

 
 
Q. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?
A. Pharaoh's daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nileand drew out a
little prophet.

 
 
Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?
A. Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in a Fury. David's Triumph
was heard throughout the land. Also, probably a Honda, because the apostles
were all in one Accord.

 
 
Q.. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
A. Samson. He brought the house down.
 
 
Q. What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden ?
A. Your mother ate us out of house and home.

 
Q. Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?
A. Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.

 
 
Q. Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?
A. The area around JordanThe banks were always overflowing.

Q. Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible?
A. David. He rocked Goliath to a very deep sleep.
 
 
Q. Which Bible character had no parents?
A. Joshua, son of Nun.

 
 
Q. Why didn't they play cards on the Ark ?
A. Because Noah was standing on the deck. (
Groan...)

 
 
PS... Did you know it's a sin for a woman to make coffee?
Yup, it's in the Bible. It says . . . "He-brews"



KEEP SMILING!!!! GOD LOVES YOU BUNCHES AND BUNCHES!!!!
Friends are God's way of taking care of us.

 

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

This was hilarious!

Nico said...

This is great humour, you should always be able to laugh and not take everything too seriously.

Anonymous said...

Those were pretty good... I like the one about all the apostles being in a Honda!

Unknown said...

These are pretty funny.

Unknown said...

These gave me a great laugh!!

penni d said...

I started laughing on the first one and could not stop. then got to the one about women and coffee and fell out of my chair with the Humor of it all.

Unknown said...

These were funny enough to share!

Unknown said...

The were hilarious and really cracked me up!!

Unknown said...

These were funny.

Unknown said...

Haha, these are quite funny!